Spiritual Parenting with Mimi Doe

Wake Up and See Pretty

I was chatting with my brother Tim yesterday.  Tim is the youngest of the four of us, second from the left in this photo taken in 1965.  I'm third from the left, grinning quite broadly for the camera. 

Tim is now a grown-up banker living in Manhattan, and while we no longer play trucks together or wear silly outfits as demonstrated above, we do chat on the phone quite a bit.

In one recent conversation Tim was telling me about a friend of his who planted hundreds of daisies in the woods outside her bedroom window.  She wanted to "wake up and see pretty."  I get that.  Don't you find that when your eyes can rest upon something of beauty you feel more inspired, calmer, and just plain more joyful?

What might you do so that you can "wake up and see pretty?"  What is "pretty" to you?

I've added three huge bulletin boards to a long wall in my office so that I can post pictures, images, material, paper, shells, whatever inspires my palette of pretty.  My daughter Whitney created one board using images of the beach that I've cut out of magazines over the years.  Sometimes I'll just swivel my chair around so I can gaze upon these beautiful images...lodged onto sea glass green rice paper...pinned onto a white framed board.  Suddenly I'm "sittin' pretty" and my entire mood changes.

Here's to your images of pretty -- be they real or cut outs.

Think about Time in a Different Way

Downshifting our often frenzied lives is crucial if we are ever going to enjoy the moment with our children.

Build in structures to give your life breathing space. Arrive 10 minutes early for your daughter’s doctor’s appointment, so you can meander up the path together, with time to stop and examine the spider’s web.  Rework how you keep a calendar and build in extra time around routine events.  Notice how you feel when you aren't rushing...notice how your children behave when you aren't rushing them!

We’re so busy multi tasking and dashing to appointments, engagements, practices – organizing our lives – that we fail to make time for the ordinary encounters and experiences that make life special. Yet, it’s those small, often unplanned things that offer us joy, help children feel connected with their lives and understand the dimensional, magical world they live in. 

When we downshift into our children’s rhythm, rather than always expecting them to notch it up to the level of a mini-CEO in order to “get there on time” or “learn something new” or “excel,” we allow them the grace that is the natural flow of childhood. Within that grace, greatness is being incubated – I assure you.

One Small Thing

It's a little thing...an organized silverware drawer...but it does help me to remain more centered and mindful...and all you have to do is go back a few posts to see the BEFORE photo...

What one small change might you make today to help you feel more at peace with the ordinary details of your life?

May Meditation

Ralph Waldo Emerson said,  "Place yourself in the middle of the stream of power and wisdom which flow into you as life."

My still small voice is not a booming proclamation nor a symphony, rather it is practical listening during my quiet times when any question is answered with God's grace.

"Be still and know that I am God."

--Psalm 46:10

Scientists tell me I have 40,000 thoughts a day.  My mind is full of rich ideas.  I chose to shift the judging, critical, fear based thought to thoughts of love.  God's great intelligence flows through me as my thoughts.  I am an extension of Source energy and so grateful to these constantly flowing ideas and inspirations.  Each moment I can pause and listen to the still small voice, the whisper of ideas Spirit means for me -- my unique awareness, skills, talents, future, past combine in this glorious now and now is what Spirit has for me when I awaken to it.  I listen, today, to the sights, sounds, prompts, ideas, suggestions, and inspirations that flow through me.

Spirit feeds me moment by moment along my way -- I already have everything I need.

 

I give great thanks for the gifts of Spirit expressing in my daily, hourly experience -- and honor Spirit by taking action on at least one of these ideas today.

Order in My Home...Order in My Soul

YES...this is the state of my silverware drawer.  I snapped a photo so I could be inspired to focus, rearrange, and deliver you an AFTER photo soon.

Don't you find that when your home is organized your calm is returned?  I always say: ORDER IN MY HOUSE...ORDER IN MY SOUL.  It's as if you can center down and get clear when your surroundings are in order.  And yet I hear from HUNDREDS of women about how out of control their lives feel.  When I dig a little deeper, it's clear that their physical surroundings perfectly reflect their state of mind: OUT OF CONTROL.

I was interviewed recently for a segment on a soon to be released new program for HGTV.  I worked with a family who felt as if they were not connected and wanted the balance I write about in my book BUSY BUT BALANCED.  One of the key connectors we talked about was having family meals.  They were eating on the run, literally.  When I visited their home it was clear why...their kitchen table was piled with papers, mail, old toys, their monthly planner, and one sad looking lazy Susan.  Simply clearing the clutter from the "heart of the home" their kitchen table -- allowed them the space to even consider eating a meal together.

Begin the journey of ordering your home with me....Let's start with our kitchens.  I'm going to be bringing you an expert on this topic in a week or so!  Stay tuned!

Spirituality and the Brain

Have you ever read Lying Awake by Mark Salzman?  It's one of my all time favorite books.  The writing is concise -- each sentence is a gem.  The story is about a cloistered nun with visions.  The images Salzman creates are stunning.  What is even more interesting, to me at least, and I read the book years ago, is the idea of how our brains are linked to our spiritual lives.  Read this novel and you too will be inspired to understand more about the brain/spirit connection. 

The past few weeks I've been reading a lot about brains.  The Science of Leonardo: Inside the Mind of the Great Genius of the Renaissance by Fritjof Capra (he wrote the Tao of Physics), The Spiritual Brain: A Neuroscientist's Case for the Existence of the Soul by Mario Beauregard and Denyse O'Leary are both on my nightstand. 

Biologist Ursula Goodenough (don't you love her name?) says:  "Science really can't talk about things like telepathy, belief, etc, in any kind of way...All that we know about physical laws would say completely irrefutably that that doesn't happen, that's not the way things work."

And yet...we who mother know a lot about our intuition and telepathy.

I simply could not believe how many scientific experiments have been done to explain things such as hands on healing, telepathy, prayer.  I read Lynn McTaggart's book The Intention Experiment a few weeks ago and felt a bit overwhelmed with all the data.  I KNOW that when I set a clear intention it is like a laser beam cutting through the material world to manifest my intention.  It's as if I clear away the clutter of distraction and hone in.  The key, for me, is to figure out what the intention is...

What do you think about the spiritual brain...

Years ago when I was a graduate student at Harvard, I was fascinated by the work of Howard Gardner, but I wondered  why in his seven forms of intelligence model he didn't include an eighth form which would be the spiritual way of being in the world....Read Gardner's book on multiple intelligences and it will give you such great insight on how you approach the world...as well as those you love.
His new book is called Intelligence Reframed.

Whew...off to get a cup of tea...too much thinking...I need some Spirit. 

Moms Don't Get Sick

I've always been a bit cocky about my "I never get sick" mantra.  In truth, I am so grateful for my abundant good health that when I was struck with the nasty flu two weeks ago I was caught off guard.  I ended up in the emergency room and only now, two weeks later, am I feeling the surge of energy I know as "me."

There is a silver lining, I believe, to being "knocked out" by illness.  Somehow it is as if the fever burns off what you don't need.  For instance, I found that I couldn't read, couldn't watch television and couldn't even listen to my ipod for over a week.  I would pause from work that had to be done and literally just sit with my eyes closed.  It was sort of a forced meditation away from life.  I also found I kicked my latte a day habit.  It's as if I've lost the taste for it and a simple cup of green tea is all I now crave.

If you find yourself one of the many flu statistics this year...take heart...It's a way your body forces your to rest and almost re/boot your senses.  Food tastes different...calm is required...and your outlook can shift.  I have so much more empathy for those with chronic illness.  How do they find the stamina to get out of bed and get dressed much less have the space for creative ideas to flow?

Wash your hands a lot, carry Purell everywhere you go, get enough sleep, get MORE than enough sleep, eat your 5 fruits/veggies each day, pick up some EmergenC to fuel you with C and electrolytes, drink lots of water and then stock up the pantry with saltines, chicken noodle soup, and ginger ale, just in case.

Helicopter Parenting

I find it fascinating that the top Google search term for today is "helicopter parenting."  Now, just what do you suppose individuals are searching for --  definitions of a style of parenting that may indeed be their own, funny stories about 'over the top' parents, or perhaps a glimmer into what Britney Spears is NOT.

Parenting trends have come and gone.  Most of us who have grown up in the western world had grandparents who embraced the authoritarian style of parenting: "Do so because I say so."  Their children responded with a more laid back attitude about parenting: "Let the child find himself."  Then came the reaction to that which was their children's more scientific approach to parenting in the 1980's.  Books like "How to Talk to Kids so Kids will Listen and Listen so Kids Will Talk" were best sellers and Dr. Ferber's formula for getting kids to sleep turned into the term "Ferberize your baby." 

Now, we shift into a new trend which is to hover.  We, as parents, want to get this project called PARENTING right.  We can't cling to any of the prior trends mentioned so we try to control.  If we can just GET IT RIGHT and organize our child's life in a certain (OUR) way  then all will be right.

It's tough to let go.  I would maintain that it's harder to let go as our children grow older...and allow them to face mistakes and consequences then it is to birth them.  When my daughter Whitney left for Africa at age 18 (she finished high school early) I simply had to trust that she was fully equipped in mind, body, and spirit and all would be well.  It was.

What are your thoughts on helicopter parenting?  Are you one?  Is that wrong?  

Valentine's Day

VALENTINE'S DAY

I love Valentine's Day not because of the sappy cards and slick merchandising...I love Valentine's Day because it's a great reminder to scatter love and delight to all those precious ones in my life. 

A few ideas for fostering the love quota in your family!!

*Read my February Newsletter for some ideas on how to ignite your romance while raising kids.

*Plan a family Valentine's dinner with lots of red candles, lacy doilies, little white lights wrapped around the room and heartfelt conversation.

*Tell your kids the feelings you had when you saw each one of them for the first time -- the amazing love that washed over you.  They'll want to hear this "love story" every Valentine's Day.

*Articulate your dreams and love yourself enough to set up a plan of action for achieving them.  Start by SEEING your dreams come true when you set up my favorite resource: Dream Manifesto.

Christmas Card Recycling

I was putting away the last of the few remaining whispers of Christmas: cobalt blue, shimmering, glass balls perched in a crystal bowl and a long tray piled with all the cards we received. 

I spent time going through the cards again, now that the house is quiet and there aren't the distractions from bringing myself fully present to each card, each family, each beautiful message.  I was reminded of something we did years ago when my daughters were little.  Rather than part with the holiday cards, we decided to focus on one card each day after the holidays.  I would place that card in the middle of the kitchen table and we would pause before our meal, focus upon the photo or card and send love and light to the sender. How I wish we had kept up that practice so it had become a tradition...but...life whirled around us the next January and...alas...the stack of cards did not receive our full focus -- one by one.

If you have not yet thrown out your holiday cards...try this simple ritual.  Let me know how it goes. 

Love and light!

Mimi